Simple Things

I love thinking of all the things that have led me to this point. I love thinking about how I've felt in the past compared to my present. I love all of the smallest details that could have made things turn out so much differently.

Over the last six months or so, I can't say I was ever truly happy. Not like I am right now anyways. I was content with everything, but all I could think of is "what else is out there." I knew that the relationship I was in wouldn't last long. Not to say it didn't teach me anything. It made me do more for me. It made me more artsy and I remember everything I loved before. I started drawing and reading more. I think I'm more "me" now than I ever was before.

However, right now, I am the happiest I've ever been with someone. And we're not even together (physically). We have 600 miles that separate us, but I've never felt closer to someone. Its the kind of connection that doesn't always happen. Its one that when it does happen, you want to keep it. And you don't want it to change. It makes you feel like today is the happiest day of your life until the next day.

It makes me happy that something as simple as a "Skype date" can make the both of us so happy. Just talking for hours on end about anything and everything. Just the simple fact that we would rather spend our Friday nights talking to each other than going out somewhere. Its such a simple, but important, thing to me.

The 600 miles between us have made me appreciate the simplest things. Being ten minutes away from someone is something everyone takes for granted, but I really appreciate that now. I can't wait till I have that in the fall. Or just something as simple as holding someone's hand. That's all I want. But fortunately that will happen soon.

The most amazing thing so far is the fact that he's willing to travel those 600 miles via a 14 hour train ride just to see me for a couple of days. All that distance just so we won't have to wait the entire rest of the summer to see each other. Currently, the count is at 21 days for me (20 for him) and it doesn't even seem that long. Its going to be so worth everything.

The thing is that I don't care about what we do. I want to have experiences and memories, but I don't care how those happen. My main thing is just to be with each other. That is all I care about. And that is the difference in this relationship. Its not about the actual experiences, its about who they're with. In the past, I tried to have experiences because I had certain things I wanted to do. But it wasn't necessarily about who they were with (even though it seemed like it at the time). Something always seemed off in them. It wasn't the kind of memory I wanted to make. It was fun and everything, just not quite as memorable as I had hoped. But this is different. Everything about this is different and I'm so excited about my future now. Especially if every day becomes happier than the last.